Writing

Here is an assortment of stuff I have written. For a spotty narrative of my recent life, check out my livejournal. You might have to go back a ways to get a nice sampling, because I tend to write about the same stuff for a few months.

Livejournal

Besides that, I’ve uploaded some of the amusing tidbits I’ve written over the years.

Short Stories and other Assorted Writing

War Against the Moths – A livejournal post

Welcome to ECS, please check your frontal lobe at the door – Short story written after my last UCD final

Canadian American War – Beer, wine, and sleep deprivation inspired this classic creation.

Manual for the Ronco-50 – A random, Engrish inspired creation after far too much time spent in the journalism computer lab in high school.

Existentinationalism & Grading

The News. Fake, of course.

Fake news has always been fun. I love parodies– most of my early short stories were techno-thriller parodies. I wrote for the high school paper and an “underground” paper in high school, so I had the style and the diction of a journalist. News takes itself very seriously and is consequently ripe for parody. It is the perfect medium for commentary on the real news, too. Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, and the Onion (the quality of which has slipped in recent years) have made fake news a profession.

Hand Me Down 4/20/2001 – The one UC Davis-centric issue I released of the high school underground newspaper I wrote some articles for.

Clashes Erupt After Rebel Warned – So much for Al-Sadr… meet the real trouble-maker, Jesus!

White House Scraps “Road Map” in Favor of “Palestinian Infrastructure Upgrade” – Walking on the edge of tastelessness, whitehouse.org style.

Iraqis Upset by New Flag Designs

Libyan Leader Celebrated in Montana – Tastelessness is one of my hallmarks. When my eyes bulge and I think– No I can’t say that! I know I must.

Christopher Lee Killed By Israeli Missile

Experts Forecast Record Tearfall Nationwide This Valentine’s Day – a classic.

Over 40,000 stolen artifacts returned to Iraq– speculation of organized crime involvement

Killer’s Death Sentence Commuted to Life in IT

Ashcroft: Al-Qaeda Targeting Canada

Hyundai Chief Found Dead Next to Car

US Investigates Mini-bottles

US Military Sets Sights on Bulgaria

Thoughts on Shock and Awe – one of the best I’ve ever written, I think.